Today's news is brought to you by really loud full-length denim skirts in the library. "DenimTM--I guess its not tacky anymore."

First up: Iraq will FINALLY control their own damn military!!! Tony Blair will FINALLY hand over the British government (his aides have been a big help in assuring that). USA Today loves stereotypes! NATO: Progress in the Taliban fight? We'll see. Well, at least Pakistan will be there. Who doesn't love heads! Some people have so much tact. World leaders--including many EU officials--meet to discuss Iran's nuclear petulance. In good news, Israel takes a bigger step toward peace with this step.

In National News: Bush's great efforts in the Middle East has paid of for someone, at least: heroin dealers. USA Today sensationalizes terror fears a little more, while the New York Times finds that many New Yorkers must be reading USA Today. Apparently we're happy having every oraface searched, and every little detail of our personal lives scrutinized all in the spirit of irrational fear and racism. As 'Gitmo' trials set to resume (not much different than before), and while moving prisoners, Bush comes clean, Republicans NEVER flip-flop. And Bush gets cocky(er). From the "what have we learned" file: Another Katrina will most likely do the same kind of damage. Our borders--where we consistently get our asses handed to us over and over. Democratic leaders should really read the previous bunch of stories, and get to the bottom of things. Here is some follow up in an oil story I reported on yesterday. More on the labor day Maine massacre. The 'Fed': "Economic growth slowing." Well duh. No stopping Apple. And, this is cute about Google News. And no not EVERYONE spies on their loved ones!

Weather Watch: Go Flo! The Queer Weather Center is really excited about our second hurricane of the season!

In Celebrity News: Paris Hilton--STOP DRINKING! Fashion is dead (for now).
This baby looks Asian to me...


Best in Op-Ed: I disagree with this guy on Gibson, but like the larger picture--and can you believe that 'Lear' producer?

LGBT newsbeat: Wisconsin's top lawyers have come out against the state's constitutional ammendment banning marriage equality (yet, how much you want to bet the people are stupid enough to pass it anyway). Where in the Torah does God ban the mixing of latexes? Apparently South Africa is the same ammount of messed-up as the church, when it comes to AIDS. This is bone-chillingly sad: I really hope the hellfires are hot when the city council members get there. More cases of parents being hysterical, kids shrugging it off. The Governator vetoes the bias-free school bill, and dooms another class of kids to torture, torment and misery. Get him out of office. This is the complete opposite of what I've heard from ACTUAL lesbians in the military. "Lesser of Two evils wins" in Florida Republican Primary. More on Rove's gay father.

That's it for today kids, have fun storming the castle!